Ministry. I thought I knew it all. In ministry everyone thinks that you are an amazing person. You are nice, faithful, righteous, giving, kind, generous, loving, christ-like. I guess I'm being foolish in thinking these things. The world won't love me, because I am showing Christ. I'll be often disliked, midjudged, misunderstood. I have to lay down everything.
My reputation is oddly and shamefully important to me. I feel as though it has been dedicated to Christ because I want my reputation to be that of a Christian. But... Christ needs me to let go of even that vision. I am still the one dealing with and forming my reputation. CHRIST needs to take it and do with it as he pleases. He will shape that part of my life in a way that will bring him the most glory, however that is. If the Lord wants people to see me in a light that isn't as flattering as I hoped then He will make me look that way. But what is more important than giving it all to Christ? Nothing.
My reputation is oddly and shamefully important to me. I feel as though it has been dedicated to Christ because I want my reputation to be that of a Christian. But... Christ needs me to let go of even that vision. I am still the one dealing with and forming my reputation. CHRIST needs to take it and do with it as he pleases. He will shape that part of my life in a way that will bring him the most glory, however that is. If the Lord wants people to see me in a light that isn't as flattering as I hoped then He will make me look that way. But what is more important than giving it all to Christ? Nothing.
Help me to lay it down.
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